http://www.noizemag.com/index.php en ronn@spongeworks.com Copyright 2011 2011-10-28T17:26:50+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/where_are_all_the_gay_men_in_offices_these_days/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/where_are_all_the_gay_men_in_offices_these_days/ You know, gay co-workers who are clearly gay? Flamboyant. Fun. Flirty. Fashionable. Fabulous! Now that we are all part of the conversation, do we miss the secret updates, contorted facial gestures, and rosy-red cheeks of embarrassment when there was a line that could be crossed? Does being fully out to our co-workers mean that we can now regale them with stories about our fabulous private lives? Or should we tone it down? Just recently, the Center for Work-Life Policy published a landmark study in the respected Harvard Business Review that is the first such academically rigorous analysis of gays in the workforce. The good news? Based on nearly 3,000 respondents, the researchers found that we’re ambitious (just ask our personal trainer), committed to our jobs (too committed, if you ask the boyfriend), “willing to go the extra mile for employers” (willing to go down for some employers who look like Ben Cohen), and better educated (duh!). More good news: 52 percent of us are out at work. Now the bad news: 48 percent aren’t. And in way too many states and local jurisdictions, we don’t have any protections against discrimination. That’s a sobering thought. But I’m old enough to remember when even the ones you could spot with a pince-nez halfway down your nose — you know, the flamboyant gay-as-a-goose, the Just-Jack screamer, the Liberace flamer, the sulky James Dean bad boy, the sexy nerd — never publicly revealed their sexuality and certainly didn’t discuss it during office hours, except for maybe a shared cigarette with another Friend of Dorothy well outside corporate headquarters. (I can make that assumption because, in those days, everyone smoked. Another big difference from then and now.) The recent end of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” not only means that gay men and lesbians can serve openly in our armed forces: It’s the most potent symbol possible in a democracy that we have arrived as citizens equal in every way to our heterosexual counterparts. All this gooey goodness, however, comes with a few caveats. First of all, let’s look back on the bad old days when we were at least nominally closeted. We would have to suffer the forced bonhomie of the dreaded water cooler. Gay men had to express an interest in team sports (when the only baskets most of us cared about were the ones inside the uniforms). Lesbians had to profess interest in recipes, child rearing, schools and sex-reluctant spouses. Well now, we love team sports. We’re having kids. And lesbians can finally dish with their straight girlfriends about sex-reluctant spouses. Does this mean that we have graduated to the point where we are given the same God-given rights to pull out endless snapshots of Little Prince and Madonna taking their first steps? That the gals can share their recipe for no-cook vegan faux meatloaf? That we’re given carte blanche to complain about how crowded the ferry to Fire Island was, how horrible the music at Tea and how ghastly the housemate’s attempt at a clam frittata? Let us keep in mind that full equality does not have to include the right to be boring. On the other hand, there’s the question of Too Much Information. Where straight, married, parenting co-workers live lives somewhere between Leave It to Beaver and Desperate Housewives, some of us have more sex partners in one weekend than these people will have had in their entire lives. If you think I’m exaggerating, try this experiment: Imagine it’s the Tuesday (‘cuz you took Monday off) after the Saint-at-Large Black Party and Alegria XXXtreme. Now imagine that a co-worker innocently asks you what you did last weekend. It’s probably easier to imagine what you didn’t do. Now describe to Mabel in Accounts Payable the sexual mosh pit of the dance floor, the omnipresent “back room,” the outfit that told everyone you were Jewish at 20 paces. The key word here is “discretion.” That doesn’t mean you have to be an Uncle Tom (OK, Auntie Tomasina). You can talk about your life, because much of your life really is every bit as quotidian as theirs. It’s just that you’re so busy thinking about the next party, the next sex date or the next Atlantis cruise to step back and realize that, yes, you too did the laundry. You took the dog for a walk. You saw Mom in the ‘burbs. You defrosted the refrigerator. See, our lives are just like theirs — only with added spice. Oh, and don’t get suckered in by the conspiratorial employee who puts her (traditionally a “her,” but the advent of the metrosexual and stag hag has changed that) arm around you and gets you to confide in her. You feel you really have a friend at last — someone to explain that you’re wearing sunglasses not because you ran into a subway door but because your pupils are still dilated; that that “date” was really a hand-job in the club restroom; that you don’t mention the last name of your latest “boyfriend” because your fuck buddy never gave it to you. Girlfriend, you won’t even have to open her Twitter account or Facebook page. Before you get back to your desk, everyone in the office will know that that “fungal infection” you were treated for last spring was the clap, and that you don’t really have an aunt named Gina whom you visit periodically. This is a brave new world — on both sides. Don’t make it any harder for well-meaning straight co-workers by pushing your world on them. Flaunt the shirt, recent Botox treatment and photos from your trip to Belize. But if they ask how the Atlantis Cruise or the early spring trip to Palm Springs went, just smile sweetly and tell them you accidentally deleted all your photos. 2011-10-28T16:26:50+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/the_incredible_shrinking_circuit_body/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/the_incredible_shrinking_circuit_body/ Circuit party boys could be likened to almost anything; from “crystal queens” to “roid users” to just-plain “average Joes,” the accuracy of who does what and when is left up to interpretation. Still, Circuit parties — whether in Miami, Dallas or San Francisco — have always had one constant: the guys with the incredible Adonis physiques. He’s the man on the poster, muscles bulging, package stuffed. A real-life demigod — like the mythical Adonis, loved by Venus. We would watch him dance, lusted after him, idolized him, and maybe were inspired to work out and diet even harder by him. The Adonis look was at the top of the food chain. It meant you were masculine. Using their bodies like currency, these beautifully sculpted men danced in our dreams, went to the head of the velvet-rope line, and made us somehow feel prettier just by dancing next to them. “The Adonis ideal epitomizes everything masculine,” Roberto Olivardia, a clinical instructor at Harvard Medical School, told noiZe. “Big biceps, strong chest, chiseled pecs, powerful legs. What is really being idealized is not the body, per se, but the expression of masculinity. To achieve an attractive, fit body is to be the envy of other men, and the object of desire at the same time.” A fit, muscular body is also subtle communication of one’s sexual prowess. “However,” Olivardia added, “these days there is less emphasis on the ‘roided’ look, but that doesn’t mean that looking fit has faded away.” Even the emo guy with the skinny jeans is still supposed to look lean and fit. There is a more androgynous look acceptable these days.” Others have also noticed the incredible shrinking gay men — in terms of muscle, but maybe not so much in girth. But are the number of twinks and cubs really increasing on the dance floor? Collin Kwan, 31, a graphic designer and self-professed Circuit boy living in San Francisco, says that he believes the perceptions of the Circuit body changed along with the aging of the generation that objectified them. “Ten years ago I attended my first Circuit party and the definition of what was ‘ideal’ has changed dramatically,” he said. “Back then everyone wanted a tall, young, white muscular guy. Now it seems that the standard of beauty has changed, because the same people are still going to these events and they have gotten older. As we’ve aged, so have our tastes for what we used to like.” More of All Kinds of Bodies & Ethnicities Kwan, who is Chinese-American, says that there are now many more nationalities attending the big events and that lusting after the white male Adonis has begun to fade along with the homogeneity of the dance floor. Like Kwan, Skyver Sagun, 28, is a Circuit veteran of recent vintage (seven years) who has also noticed a change in what and who is considered hot: “We used to follow around the big muscle jocks; but now it seems like young twinks are more prevalent on the Circuit, and they are the hot commodity.” Robert J. Vezina, founding president and executive director of the BBCM Foundation, which produces Montreal’s mammoth Black & Blue Festival, said he has witnessed what he calls a “nice evolution of the clientele attending our festival over the years. Of course, there are many buff and muscular guys from all over the world who attend and enjoy not only our main event, but also our popular specialized activities such as the Jock Ball, the Leather Ball and the Military Ball.” These other partygoers include younger people who may be less into bodybuilding; beautiful bisexual French-Canadian men who have a European look; and gay-friendly straight men (who are often more into big muscles than we are). He welcomes the diversity. “It makes for a very interesting, hip and exciting crowd,” he said. “We believe that this special mix has ensured the major continued success of the event over the years.” Add to that the increasing number of dance events that cater to bears, such as Blowoff in New York and Washington, D.C., and the many bear parties in San Francisco. At these parties, being lean and buff may not exactly be a detriment, but it certainly isn’t the accepted norm, either. Waning of the Buff Obsession? New Yorker Shawn Flanningan, 42, who has been attending events like Black Party for more than 20 years, noted that “being on the scene for so long, you expect many things to change, such as which is the hottest party drug of the moment.” But there was one change he says he never expected to change — the worship of the Adonis types. “Obsessing about body image, whether you want to shrink or bulk up, can get unhealthy quickly,” Olivardia said. “Eating disorders, body dysmorphic disorder, steroid use, cosmetic surgeries all start with an obsession about body image.” Obsessing about your physicality is often not a good thing because it means “that you are too preoccupied with your body image, to the exclusion of other important things in your life.” Olivardia believes that literally millions of men are adversely affected by problems of body image. For a while, Flanningan says he “was one of those guys. But in the past five years, I’ve noticed that the waif-twink had made its return to the top of the pedestal. Don’t get me wrong, the buff guy will always be admired for his rippling muscles. But there are just more and more skinny young dudes at these events.” He believes the younger generation’s dream guy doesn’t look like what he remembers wanting when he was their age. The shift in attitude may very well be the outcome of the barrage of marketing thrown at gay teens of images of super-skinny boys in tight jeans. If you look at current trends of style, big is out while tiny is in. All in all, the openness to different body types and even idealizing them is probably a healthy sign that the Circuit is entering a more inclusive phase. In the 1990s, the biggest guys dominated the dance floor. Not a bad thing necessarily, but some of them (or many, depending on your point of view) gave off attitude toward those who didn’t meet their standards. Today, regardless of body image — whether you’re an Adonis, a twink or a Goldilocks (not too big, not too small) — you’ll find the dance floor open and fun loving. An overall feeling of inclusion and acceptance for all body types, ethnicities and ages is good for all of us. Even the Adonises.   2011-10-28T16:24:48+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/exposing_yourself/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/exposing_yourself/ Twitter, Facebook and Grindr give new definition to “Where’s the beef?” Have you noticed that too many of life’s moments are now permanently captured in cyberspace?  Digital cameras and iPhones have taken our most treasured, private moments, and digitized them for the entire world to see.  This works fine for birthdays and bar mitzvahs, car crashes and passed-out-drunk evenings, but when did genitalia and titillating body parts come into the equation? I know we have Xtube, and collegetube, and blondetube (instead of just boob-tube), as well as Grindr, Facebook, Twitter and MeetMeInTheJohn.com – but when did taking a quick shot of yourself in the bathroom or office become part of the workday — not just for the gays, but for, well, members of Congress?  Hey, Chris Lee and Anthony Weiner, welcome to the party!  I guess taking internet photos of any body part that is normally covered by clothing is the new pick-up line.  Instead of “Hello, you’re cute,” or “Hi, I like your shirt,” we can now say absolutely nothing and send off a photo of our limp dick or shaved pussy.  I’m sorry, our soft penis and groomed vagina.  Why bother saying something interesting or forming a whole sentence? Isn’t a picture worth a thousand words? So what 3,000+ words did Anthony Weiner say with his photos? “Look at the small bulge in my crotch and the cheesy light blue underwear I have on. Don’t I look like a high school sophomore wishing someone could get me hard?” “Isn’t my chest chiseled? I’m a stud. I work out. I am hot. I am tan. I am a stud.  Do you want my lean, ripped body to come over?” “See, it gets hard.  Want it?” Let’s face it. Using any of these lines in person would definitely work, even for the unimaginative that you might hit on. Of course, Weiner just sent parts, whereas Lee had his head attached. That is one way to be sure the torso goes with the head, and the blame as well. But headless torsos are the Adonises of this decade. Why ruin a perfectly good come-on torso shot by attaching your head? Talk about scaring the good ones away quick! Why can’t the straights learn from the gays when it comes to ruining your (political) career, or your future in general? If you are going to take a photo of your private parts, know that you have made a permanent donation to the Internet’s vast store of images. Someone has it, somewhere in the world. Probably someone is using it, pretending it is a photo of them. In general, stick to the most graphic, detailed, stomach churning photos you can produce, just like the gays. That means a closeup of your raging hard-on; a magnifying-glass photo of your anus, up so close that the rings can be counted and your last meal identified; a shot of just your nipple, either one; cum shots (of which there are a thousand variations, including dribble, spurt, soaked keyboard, drenched stomach, and drippy hand). You see, if you are going to produce even one public photo (including over your cell phone), you might as well make the best you can. An underwear shot, Mr. Weiner, was something an eighth grader would do when trying to flirt with Becky Beaverstone after school. Next time, stand in your bathroom mirror flexing both biceps while completely naked. Now that will get you re-elected! Flirting has become the “shirt lift hello.” Now that the entire world knows what really goes on in photo text messages, email, and online messaging services, we can only expect that there will be an increase in this type of behavior.  And as a result, some common actions will emerge. The first is already the revised hello. Basically, you remove the hello, lift your shirt up to just below your nipple so that your flat stomach is exposed, and send that as your introductory message. That is the qualifying opening line. Without it, everything else is premature and can be dismissed once you either don’t provide this photo, or prove your fat percentage to be over 10% through some other unflattering photo. You can find the “shirt lift hello” on every gay site, cell phone, email inbox and Grindr profile photo on all seven continents on planet Earth. Well, except for certain South Sea islands. Unfortunately, in New York, tattoos and bellybutton piercings tend to make you much less anonymous. Because the next time someone goes down on you and notices, they will realize they have a few photos of you on their phone and computer that match up…and you won’t be running for office anytime soon. 2011-08-01T13:00:57+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/lady_gaga/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/lady_gaga/ It wasn’t that long after a shy former New York University student named Stefani Germanotta had reinvented herself as Lady GaGa that she became noticed on the gay club scene. Her first big breakthrough came at the Sunday Pool Party at the annual mega-Circuit party, the Palm Springs White Party, where, on April 20, 2008, she performed “Just Dance” for the first time before a live audience. Shortly after that, she performed at the Size Sundays@Here Lounge party in West Hollywood. “The first time she performed at Size, she was a complete unknown,” recalls Promoter-Producer Tom Whitman. “But I thought she was so talented, as both a performer and as a songwriter, I asked her to perform at Wonderland,” the mammoth party that caps L.A.’s Gay Pride celebrations. She had 14 dancers on a huge stage. People were talking about her distinctive musical abilities and showbiz know-how — not all positively: “A couple of people would say to me, ‘Tom, what’s the deal? Why are you trying to make Lady GaGa happen?’ Well, I had the last laugh. By the time she performed at Cherry Pop [Aug. 23, 2008], she had blown up. Everyone knew her first single and she was on her way to becoming a megastar.” Another major L.A. figure on the gay scene, Jeffrey Sanker, meanwhile, was impressed enough with her performance at his White Party that he booked her for White Party Las Vegas. By the time she performed there, on Saturday, Oct. 11, 2008, she had had chart-topping hits off her landmark album The Fame. Although she had become an international sensation, GaGa didn’t forget Sanker’s initial faith in her, and she performed again for him, at the White Party’s 20th year anniversary on Saturday, April 11, 2009. According to Sanker’s spokesperson, “One week before the event, Jeffrey was informed she might cancel because Saturday Night Live wanted her to host on April 11th; 24 hours later she turned down SNL, saying ‘They will ask me to host SNL again’ — then followed up with her entire 75-minute ‘The Fame Ball Tour’ performance at the Saturday White Party.” The last time she would play for Sanker would be later that year, when she made a special appearance at his Sundays at Voyeur party. This was the very first “official” release party of her follow-up album, The Fame Monster. She arrived with her mother and Paris Hilton, and sang “Speechless” a capella. Perhaps the most “Gagaesque” of her early performances occurred — where else? — on Fire Island, when she performed at Daniel Nardicio’s notorious Underwear Party at the Ice Palace in Cherry Grove. It was Nardicio’s birthday, August 8, 2008, and it may be the only gig where Lady GaGa was overdressed compared to her audience. 2011-08-01T13:00:57+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/noise_overdose/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/noise_overdose/ In 2004, a Canadian independent film was released about a DJ who lost his livelihood because he went completely deaf. It’s All Gone Pete Tong was a fictional tale, but a bevy of club world heavyweights, including the legendary Pete Tong himself, decided to join the project as talking heads in the mockumentary. Unfortunately, the movie’s depiction of rampant deafness among DJs was hardly fiction. Any DJ, sound technician, promoter or avid party person should recognize that hearing loss is a very real threat on the dancefloor. Superstar DJ Danny Tenaglia has been talking about dealing with tinnitus via white noise therapy on his Facebook page. Guy Smith, the Circuit’s premier lighting wizard, told noiZe, “There are a lot of DJs that we work with — I won’t name names — but you can call their name right behind them and they can’t hear you.” Smith himself suffers from tinnitus, which he describes as “a constant shrieking in my ears.” DJ Quentin Harris suffers from hearing loss, and told noiZe that if he leaves both monitors on all night he leaves the club with a headache. This problem isn’t exclusive to our community, of course. The list of people suffering from some form of hearing loss or tinnitus reads like a Kennedy Center Honors list: Barbra Streisand, Bill Clinton, Bono, Cher, Pete Townshend, William Shatner, Steve Martin. The U.S. National Institute on Deafness approximates that 28 million Americans are affected by noise-induced hearing loss, a number expected to climb to 78 million by 2030. Dr. Kent Collins, an audiologist, claims that the average age of patients who require hearing aids has gone down, from 64 to 48, in only 10 years. What exactly causes this damage? Our ears have an outer, a middle, and an inner section. “In the inner ear there are hair cells,” explained Maris Appelbaum, director of Hearing Aid Services at Montclair State University. “The conversion of sound into neural activity is believed to happen by the tips of the hair cells.” The inner ear houses the delicate hairs that allow us to process everyday sounds. When those hairs are exposed to frequencies and pressure, whether it’s a sudden explosion of sound or a prolonged exposure to very loud music, they become damaged. That damage can be temporary or permanent, and range from annoying to debilitating. “It’s never too late to wear ear protection,” Appelbaum added. OSHA, the federal agency that regulates workplace safety, has permissible noise levels for industrial noise. “There are no levels for music,” says Appelbaum, “because the levels vary greatly, and it is difficult to estimate a person’s true exposure over time.” OSHA caps industrial noise levels at 85 dB (decibels). Rock concerts and dance events clock in at 110 to 120 dB, just above a diesel train and right below a gunshot or a jet taking off. Guy Smith has been clocking sound pressure on the dance floor since the disco era, and says that his readings indicate a fourfold increase since then. Aural Fixation DJs are the centerpiece of the music we listen to, and love loud music just as much as we do, but the ones who have been around the longest know the score and realize that more sound doesn’t necessarily equal better sound. Is Michael Fierman a rare exception to the rule about DJs who suffer from hearing loss because he pioneered “Morning Music” sets and the peppy Fire Island sound? “I have perfect hearing after playing records for over 30 years,” he boasts. His secret is deceptively simple: “Turn the volume of your monitors down, and then you can turn down the level of your headphone.” David Knapp sees the link between headphones and monitors as crucial. “Based on my experience, the most common reason DJs have their monitors too high is that they have their headphones blasting really high in their ear. A secret I learned from a mentor DJ is to start out keeping the headphone level as low as possible,” he advises, “just enough to hear what you are mixing in.” If not, a DJ can begin to suffer “aural fatigue,” the term for continually turning up the volume to compensate for weaker and weaker hearing. As the DJ gets deafer, so does the crowd. Quentin Harris gives the age-old advice to read your crowd. “Watch your levels and watch your dancers,” he says. “They will let you know if you are playing too loud.” Chances are if you see people shouting at each other or holding their hands to their ears, they’re not really enjoying your set anyway. But does it have to be that loud? The Saint At Large hired sound engineer and DJ Alex Funk to fine-tune the sound for Black Party this year. Just renting an expensive system isn’t enough, warns Funk: “I’ve heard of people bringing in half-million-dollar sound systems that when they were set up, sounded like absolute dog shit.” He likens it to tuning an expensive and very fast car: If you don’t do it just right, you end up with smoke coming out of the hood. In this case, “the smoke isn’t coming from under the hood, it’s coming out of your ears.” Less Can Be More Guy Smith and Funk teamed up with the new owners of Fire Island’s Pavilion last year to improve sound quality. The key? Less is more. “One of the changes that we made was that we actually removed equipment, because there was so much equipment it was defeating itself.” They repositioned speakers and installed technology that allows them to modulate the sound for optimal performance. So how do you protect your ears? Earplugs, of course. It’s gotten to the point that event promoters should consider approaching earplug makers to sponsor their parties. And how do you know if it’s too loud? “If you have any urge to put your hand over your ears, that’s your body telling you that it doesn’t like it,” Funk says. As a musician who suffered from hearing-related problems, Kathy Peck formed Hearing Education and Awareness for Rockers (H.E.A.R.) 23 years ago in San Francisco as a response to a lack of advocacy in the concert world for hearing-related issues. The Who’s Pete Townshend was an early financial backer of the group — one of many veteran rockers now suffering deafness. H.E.A.R. produces public service announcements and helped pass a local ordinance that requires music venues to distribute free earplugs. Peck recommends custom musician’s earplugs, Mack’s Hear Plugs, ER20 Earplugs — or foam earplugs in a pinch. Fierman, for one, believes that if a significant number of people on the dance floor are wearing earplugs, the DJ and sound engineer are doing something wrong. “The reality is that if someone is dropping 100,000 watts of sound system into a building or out on a beach, they have a huge responsibility for people’s health,” Funk says. Europe caps the sound level in clubs at 95 dB, but currently we have no such regulation. That may change as an entire generation becomes hard of hearing.   2011-08-01T13:00:01+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/crossover_appeal/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/crossover_appeal/ Today, music and DJs appeal alike to gay and straight listeners. As young Americans come to accept gay men as part of the scene, more and more of us feel comfortable at raves. Is it the “death” of Circuit parties — or have they assimilated into the mainstream? Peace, love, unity, and respect: together they form PLUR, an acronym that became the defining motto of the rave scene in the ‘90s. Sure, a lot has changed in the party world since the days when NYC club kids were rolling (often literally) out from under the shadows of the dance community and onto daytime talk shows. Even the word “rave” is used less often, as parties become bigger, more visible, and less underground. Call them whatever you want: huge dance festivals like Electric Daisy Carnival (EDC) are clearly the next evolutionary step in rave culture. So it makes sense that the same progressive, PLUR-style philosophy has turned them into non-gay-specific events that are beginning to attract more and more gay partiers among the colorful crowd. “Real ravers are all about the peace and love thing. They’re like neon-colored hippies,” says David Bond, a gay Los Angeles college student and music writer for Soundbleed.com. The inclusive sense of community is a big part of why he’s partied at events like EDC and HARD, another huge, mixed electronic music fest where he remembers snapping photos of kissing gay couples (among other partiers) for the site. “It’s all about enjoying ourselves and being around people who love the same music. I wouldn’t say rave culture is outright embracing gays specifically, just everyone in general. It’s a lot different than going out to clubs in West Hollywood where it’s strictly gay men and women around. At a rave you deal with people of all walks, but it’s by no means uncomfortable to be out and proud.” Parties like these have become so large they’re bound to represent different diversities. Take EDC, which launched in 1997 and has grown exponentially. The 2010 installment drew 185,000 attendees to Los Angeles, making it the largest electronic music festival outside Europe. Major DJs like Deadmau5, Armand Van Helden and Sasha took to the stage over two days and five different stages. The sheer number of huge, mixed events is growing, too. Another hot ticket is Electric Zoo, a Labor Day weekend party that launched in 2009 and feels like an East Coast answer to EDC. This NYC massive is growing fast: it had around 26,000 attendees over the course of its inaugural weekend, but last year numbered nearly the same per day. In 2011, it will expand to three days. Rave Promoters Now Court Gay Partiers So expect that the gay crowd will continue to grow, too – and not just as some proportional accident. Refreshingly, many promoters of these events are actively inviting the gay community. “The dance music scene is first and foremost about people coming together to hear music that they love, and to dance to it. Acceptance and being yourself has been the cornerstone of dance music since its origin,” says Laura de Palma, cofounder of Made Event, which produces Zoo. She saw an organic growth in gay attendees between the first two years of the event, but with 2011, “We want to clearly get the word out in the gay community that Electric Zoo is the place to be on Labor Day Weekend!” Why are these huge mixed events becoming more popular with gay partiers? The obvious answer is that the gay community has become more embraced by the larger culture in general over the years. We’re no longer in a position where we need to feel relegated only to No Straights Allowed-style Circuit parties. Now, if the music’s good and loud, we’ll go. But look in the crowd at events like, say, EDC — where plenty of sweaty, half-naked torsos are covered in costumes, candy jewelry and glitter — and it’s obvious that the style of an old-school rave still shines through. So too, naturally, does that PLUR mentality that has always seemed to welcome gays to the proverbial party. “For me, being at a rave was almost as comfortable as being at a gay club in terms of dancing or kissing another guy on the dance floor,” says Terry Estok. The gay Bostonian has been going to raves and parties like Electric Zoo, Ultra in Miami and Love Parade in San Francisco since his teens. He’s in his early 30s now, and finds that, “for the most part the PLUR manifesto still stands true today. People went to raves to get out of the norm, be different and be yourself. For me, being gay in the rave scene was never an issue, and I know plenty of other queer men and women that feel the same way.” The scene looks just as mixed from the stage. DJs and performers we spoke to agree that massive, rave-style events are definitely drawing an increasing mix of gay and straight crowds. And again, they point to a mutual attraction to the music as the unifying force: “Maybe five or seven years ago, it was more separate. But as electronic music keeps slowly creeping into the mainstream, it brings more and more people together,” says JES (a/k/a Jes Brieden), a singer/songwriter who frequently collaborates with DJs like Tiësto and BT and regularly performs at huge global parties. But she’s also a popular Pride performer, and recently launched her “Awaken Campaign” to bring attention to the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center, among other organizations. JES believes that there’s an inherent universality to the music that helps make these shows melting pots. “It’s a different kind of audience,” she says. “The crowds are all about peace, love, happiness and beats forever.” They seem even more mixed internationally than in the states, she adds. Gay DJ/producer Hector Fonseca agrees. And he thinks that seeing the gay and straight crowds embrace enhances the overall experience and leads to more “sophisticated” parties. “The crowd is educated more than ever, I think, because they go to both straight and gay events and are able to mix with different scenes,” he says. He’s been seeing more diverse crowds at Winter Party and Matinee events, for example. “I could tell it was a mixed crowd united there for an overall, well-produced event,” he says. “There is definitely a new appreciation and excitement.” Partying Responsibly — Or Not That’s not to say it’s a total utopia. As huge, rave-style festivals grow in number, so do the requisite douchebags. (“As the events get bigger, there’s always the obnoxious few who drop the F-bomb,” observes Bond.) And though some ravers have added a second “R” to PLURR over the years (for “responsibility”), other ravers, like Estok, wonder if drugs aren’t becoming even more prevalent. In fact, a controversy erupted last year when a teenage girl died after overdosing on ecstasy at EDC. It led to a temporary ban on raves at the event’s longtime L.A. venue, and seems to have contributed to the EDC’s migration to Las Vegas. (The bad publicity seems to have made EDC press shy as well: No one responded to repeated attempts by noiZe for an interview.) Fonseca hopes that these big festivals will start to incorporate more gay DJs, artists — and social issues — to the mix. Still, the crosscutting appeal of rave culture makes it an increasingly appealing choice for gay partiers. “These festivals have a huge potential to unite people from all backgrounds around the world,” says Fonseca. To unite, that is, in peace, love and respect. And, of course, the beat. Electric DAISY 2011 Orlando May 27-28 Denver June 11 Dallas June 18 Las Vegas June 24-26 Puerto Rico August 27 Electric Zoo 2011 New York September 2-4 2011-04-29T04:02:04+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/1st_the_march_then_the_dance/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/1st_the_march_then_the_dance/ In the ‘70s, the years after the Stonewall Riots, Pride celebrations were small-scale, highly politicized events of local interest only. In 1994, millions of people swarmed into New York for the 25th anniversary of Stonewall — and so did party promoters, who took over every venue in town, even the Intrepid, a retired U.S. Navy battleship. Today, Gay Pride in major cities has become an extended weekend of nonstop Circuit parties. Some observers are wondering if the tail (the parties) isn’t wagging the dog (Pride marches). In New York, the birthplace of the modern gay-rights movement and home to the first Pride march, the original “Christopher Street Liberation Day” was full of raw emotions and fresh memories of the clash between bar patrons and police. Today’s march is more of a parade and includes plenty of corporate sponsors and floats filled with go-go boys among the organizations representing religions, AIDS providers and every gay group imaginable. Far from being treated as a pariah, the march now attracts nearly every major local politician. The police turned their backs on the original marchers. Now the crowd greets gay officers and firemen with loud cheers. As managing director of New York’s Heritage of Pride, Chris Frederick oversees the largest party of the weekend, the Pier Dance. At least 7,000 people pack a Hudson River pier to dance and incidentally raise money for the organization that puts on the march. Rather than competing with the march, he sees the dance as an integral part of Pride celebrations. “This event was started as a way for LGBT people to come together and show that they can dance with one another out in the public view,” he says about the Pier Dance.  “I think this event, more than any other event, embodies what Pride is all about. The Dance on the Pier is one of the very few spaces left where that many LGBT people can dance together. All of the megaclubs in New York no longer exist, and you will find it hard to find another event that brings that many people in one space.”  One New Yorker, however, sees it differently. Jonathan lives with his husband on the Upper West Side and is a devotee of Ric Sena’s hugely popular Alegria Pride party, but attended the march only one year. “The concept of pride to me is not something I particularly understand all that well,” he says. “I’m not proud of who I am, I’m proud of what I do. Pride has become like my Christmas; it’s really a time to celebrate. No one really remembers what it’s about anymore.” Alegria, Wonderland, DISCO: Also Celebrating Pride Sena’s original Alegria Pride in 2000 became the template for his very successful brand of regularly scheduled Alegria parties. Alegria Pride, held Sunday night after the Pier Dance, remains the most popular Alegria of the year — it regularly sells out, although tickets are often available at various times of the evening at the door. Sena believes its success is at least partly attributable to all of the out-of-towners swarming into the city — many of whom, he adds, don’t typically go to a late-night dance party. Not only does Sena not believe that his party’s appeal eclipses the march, he sees a need for a variety of options to celebrate Pride. “Alegria Pride is also a celebration that brings the community together,” he says. “Friends fly in to see each other and to have a great time. People celebrate in different ways. It can be a free event, a march or a paid event. We’re just offering something else to do.”  On the other coast, the most anticipated event of Los Angeles’ Pride weekend is Tom Whitman’s giant Wonderland party. Whitman began throwing Wonderland in 2005 because he felt that “L.A. Pride should really have a huge event that is up to par with what Pride in the entertainment capital of the world should be.” Though it has all of the glamorous, sexy elements worthy of its Hollywood setting on a Paramount Studio lot, fête, Whitman sees his partnering with AIDS Project Los Angeles as making it part of the whole purpose of Pride. “It’s important for me personally that I tie into community organizations as much as possible,” says Whitman. Nor does he believe that the success of epic parties like Wonderland distracts people from the original reason for why these Pride weekends occur. “There are a lot of ways to celebrate Pride,” he insists. “Learning about our history is important. Continuing to fight for our rights is vital. Building up less fortunate segments of our community makes us better citizens. Supporting the youngest members of our community as they come out is crucial, as is taking care of the oldest members of our community, as is remembering that the fight against HIV/AIDS isn’t over. All of these things are important and are part of being proud. But so is the celebration element of Pride. And for myself, dancing with friends and celebrating that I found my place in the world is definitely an important part of my Pride.”   Up the coast, San Francisco’s Kyle Pickett and Billy Worthen have thrown “The DISCO” for the past four years. “Pride at The DISCO is a celebration of diversity and of gay pride,” Pickett says. “I have images from last year’s event with people holding up large signs in the midst of a crowd that includes ‘Got Pride?’ and ‘Celebrate Diversity.’ The DISCO is a celebration of who we are individually and collectively.” Perhaps emblematic of the way these big parties are being incorporated into the non-profits that put on the marches, The DISCO has been an “official” San Francisco Pride event since its inception. The promoters use hosts that help raise money for San Francisco charities and, according to Pickett, “help ensure that our vision includes giving back to our community by creating a safe and fun place for our attendees to enjoy Pride.” But whether or not these large parties continue to grow in size, in collaboration with their host cities’ official Pride celebrations or not, it appears the organizers behind them don’t want to see traditional Pride festivals or parades become extinct. It’s true that even the Pier Dance’s 7,000 attendees represent only a tiny fraction of the nearly 1.5 million people who participate in and watch the big march. “In the end, each subset will do what they do to celebrate,” observes New Yorker Jonathan. “Parades don’t go away — there’s still a Columbus Day Parade. I’ve always said New York never turns down an excuse for a parade; anything to stop traffic.”  The DISCO When: Saturday, June 25 How Many Years: 4 Originally inspired by: the 1970s NYC gay nightclub Crisco Disco, The Saint in NYC, Black Party, and DJ Cary Stringfellow Attendees: 500 to 1,000 depending on venue Tickets: $50 & the event hosts listed on http://www.friscodisco.net starting April 15 Dance on the Pier When: Sunday, June 26 How Many Years: 25 Location: Pier 54 off the West Side Highway Attendees: 7,000-8,000 Flaggers: 30 Bars: 8 Minutes of Fireworks: 20 People setting up the event: 250 Security: 200 Some Past Performers: Whitney Houston, Janet Jackson, Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Hudson, Sophie Ellis-Bextor, Cyndi Lauper Tickets: May $55; June 1-26 $75; Door $100, VIP $200, at http://www.nycpride.org Wonderland When: Saturday, June 11 How Many: 6 Location: Paramount Studios, Gower & Melrose Attendees: 3,000+ Aerialists: 10 Ferris Wheel: 1 Bars: 12 People working there: 100 Some Past Performers: Lady Gaga, Kim English, Kelis Tickets: $70-$80; Door $90; VIP $150 at http://www.tomwhitmanpresents.com Alegria Pride When: Sunday, June 26 How Many Years: 11 Location: Best Buy Theater (Times Square) Attendees: 3,000+ Seriously Stunning Visuals: Roller coaster; elephant; carousel; Gold Rush frontier town; spaceship; swimming pool Some Past Performers: Deborah Cox, Frenchie Davis, Ultra Naté, Jeanie Tracy, Suzanne Palmer Tickets: $80-$90. Check http://www.alegriaevents.com and join mailing list for pre-sales. 2011-04-29T03:27:04+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/atlantis_events_turns_20/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/atlantis_events_turns_20/ Not too many 20-year-olds can say they have cruised on six of the seven continents, or that they have explored a range of destinations like the sun-kissed beaches of Mexico, the historic ruins in Egypt, the astonishing imperial architecture of St. Petersburg,  the endless party that is Rio’s Carnival and the most exotic ports of Asia. And all that with a couple thousand of one’s closest friends. But that is exactly what Atlantis Events has been doing for the past two decades. It all started with an idea to host a gay week at a Club Med. It sold out and the guest feedback was so positive they decided to do it again. For the next seven years that was the focus of the company. But Atlantis CEO Rich Campbell and his team have been and always will be open to new experiences. So after seven years of being on land they chartered a small cruise ship. Things, as they say, just took off from there. Today they charter some of the best ships available on the high seas to take revelers to a variety of outstanding and unusual destinations. One of the primary reasons Atlantis has been able to wow its guests over the years is that they consider themselves more of an event production company than just a cruise ship line. This focus shows in more ways than one. On any given cruise, their guests are treated to such a wide variety of activities many never bother to visit any of the the ports of call! Whether it is poolside “Project Runway,” Drag Queen Bingo, cabaret performances, comedy shows, theater productions, or headliners that have included Jennifer Hudson, Patti LuPone, Margaret Cho, and Joan Rivers, the Atlantis guest always has multiple entertainment options at any given moment. For many travelers, however, their favorite part of an Atlantis experience — as essential as salt water and seagulls — is the over-the-top, themed dance parties. The Atlantis team always brings some of the hottest DJs on the scene, including Manny Lehman, Abel, Wayne G, Brett Henrichsen, Warren Gluck and more. The production is better than most Circuit parties with mind-blowing lights and lasers run by the best in the business. Most of the events, especially the tea dances, are held outdoors on the pool deck creating a unique experience that has led one promoter to comment, “Well they took away some of my business, but I have to hand it to them, they earned it!” 5,500: The Allure of a Floating Mega-Party In honor of its 20th anniversary, Atlantis is now tackling their biggest challenge yet, chartering Royal Caribbean’s Allure of the Seas. The Allure is the largest cruise ship in the business, holding 5,500 passengers. In what is a true testament to the fact that this is one Atlantis Event not to be missed, every last room was snatched up in less than a month.  The 1,000-person wait list was filled soon after. Rich Campbell and his team are working very hard to pull out all the stops and still match the right type of entertainment and parties to fit the logistics of a ship this size. The trip will be a truly unique experience even for the most jaded Atlantis guest. They have already reserved the ship for 2012. Check their website soon after the 2011 cruise. But don’t hesitate: It, too, will most likely sell out in a short period of time. Is Rich Campbell daunted by the challenge of entertaining 5,500 people? Nah! “We will be using all three of the ship’s venues with one or two shows each night,” he says. “You may not see the same show as all your friends, but there will always be an event that will appeal to you.” There will also be multiple dance parties each night, with different themes and musical styles to handle the crowds. Despite once again taking the gay vacation experience to a higher level, Atlantis has not forgotten their roots. After a hiatus from land-based excursions they started doing the Club Med events again a few years ago. This year they are bringing the Atlantis touch back to Cancun where it all began. A Sense of Community An Atlantis experience is more than the sum of its parts, however. Sure the parties need to be fabulous, the entertainers top notch and offer something for everyone, but there is also a connection and sense of community seldom found anywhere else. Despite the hot models on the website, the passenger list is as diverse as our gay culture. (Not that there aren’t plenty of model-handsome guys.) For some, this is one of the few times a year they get to commune with so many of their gay brothers and sisters. Even those coming from the most jaded gay ghettos find themselves spending time with a wider variety of people than they would in the local clubs, bars and community groups — and loving the interaction. This creates something we rarely see, an experience completely free of attitude where everyone gets to “do their thing” free of judgment.  Guys in their 70s rediscover the joy of dancing. Younger guys get to hear something other than Lady Gaga — even jazz standards. Most importantly, people connect. Countless lifelong friendships (and loves!) have found their start at an Atlantis event. Beyond the Allure of the Seas cruise and the Cancun and Puerto Vallarta events, there are three other cruises this year. In March they head to the Southern Caribbean. In August they cruise the blue waters of the Mediterranean. In October they will put on the last party of the summer on their Mexican Riviera Cruise. Atlantis promises to make all of these events stand out in honor of their 20th anniversary. They will sell out well in advance so sign up early so you don’t miss out on that fabulous Atlantis experience. 2011-02-15T10:49:08+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/i_want_to_get_to_know_you_first_not/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/i_want_to_get_to_know_you_first_not/ Too much free time can be a liability. Single guys tend to spend a lot of time mooning about how nice it would be to be in a relationship. They envy the married couples around them. They complain about how hard the dating scene is. They pine over not having his-and-his towels, a nice set of dishes, and cuddling up to watch a movie. Shopping at Bed Bath & Beyond depresses them. Yes, in their quest for true love, most of the dates go wrong or end up being unfulfilling. But what happens with these romantic hopefuls when the date goes really well? Say you’re one of these guys. Now, consider this scenario: Conversation flows well. You laugh, blush, and the flirting goes on all through dinner. You talk breezily about family, friends, work, politics (not religion), and hint at sex. And then he makes a move during dessert — asking you to come back to his place and seal the deal. You really like this guy. You make out. He (not unnaturally) wants to take it to its natural conclusion in the bedroom. So he makes a move, and that’s when you say, “I really like you. But I don’t believe in sleeping with a guy on the first date. Let’s wait until the second or third date when it will be really right.” Wrong! If this is you, you know from bitter experience what comes next. He hasn’t called you back. You email him. No response. You finally text him saying that you had a great time and would like to see him again. He responds with a . You never hear from him again. Now, Cattie knows that many people think that you shouldn’t put out on the first date. Only sluts do that. You are not a prude by wanting to wait, especially if you like the guy and want something more substantial than a one-night stand. It has to be true, because your mother told you that, right? Sorry, Mom, in the real world it doesn’t work that way. Maybe for single girls. Or, more precisely, maybe it worked that way for single girls in 1962. He was interested, and you turned him down. Who said there was going to be a second date? Who said you were going to cuddle up with your new china? Who said you should put pressure on someone to fulfill your fantasy and not give him more time to get to know you? You see, there is nothing to lose by having sex on the first date, and a lot to gain. First off, you will find out real quick if you are sexually compatible. Why have four dates, two movies, and invest time and energy into someone that you end up having bad sex with? True, a relationship is not all about sex. But it is part of a solid foundation — a crucial part. Second, having sex would give you time to talk afterwards. No conversation is as relaxing as post-coital pillow talk. If all went well, you’ll end up discussing that second date. And perhaps a third and fourth. And maybe even shopping for that china. But by saying no, everything is prematurely ended. All the Single Ladies: Learn From Your Married Friends Don’t believe me? Take a survey of your longtime married friends. Trust me, you’ll find that they met randomly. They had quickie sex. They discovered after that that they liked each other, that they had a lot in common. So they moved in together. They ended up in a relationship. And they kept having great sex. When I survey my perennially single friends, I find that they have gone on endless numbers of dates that lead nowhere. As a matter of fact, most of my best friends are people I had sex with first. I often say, most of my friends are former tricks. And I have so many friends. These are the ones who didn’t end up being boyfriends but girlfriends, usually because the sex didn’t work out, but the friendship did. Don’t we all want good sex and a good relationship? As for those who insist that if you have sex too early, you may find out that you are sexually incompatible … well, that argument confuses me. While the traditional definition of a gay relationship is one on top and one bottom, that recipe isn’t written in stone. I know plenty of top-top and bottom-bottom relationships that have lasted for over 10 years. I know plenty of top-top relationships that are really bottom-bottom, and even more where it is more like flip and flop. The point is, having sex on the first date doesn’t have to include every sexual position or action. Sometimes making out and getting blown after dinner or good old-fashioned frottage (bumping skin without penetration) is enough to get to a second date. Then there’s the other guy to consider. If he says he wants to get to know you first, forget it: He finds you physically repugnant. How do I know this? Because all men are horndogs. If you go out with a guy and he finds you hot, he is going to want to jump your bones. He’ll probably have his tongue halfway down your throat before you’re out of the restaurant and his hand down your pants before you hit the sidewalk. 2011-02-15T07:49:10+00:00 http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/white_wedding_party/ http://www.noizemag.com/index.php/articles/white_wedding_party/ A recent study by the Center for Research on Gender and Sexuality at San Francisco State University confirmed what many suspected, although it was never before officially quantified: Many gay men in committed relationships not only like to play around but also approve of their partners doing the same. Researcher Colleen Hoff, in comments that were widely circulated and commented on in the media, concluded this was not only widespread but even healthy: We tend to negotiate ground rules and open relationships as a way to build trust and longevity. Such thinking extends to same-sex marriage, now legal in several nations, throughout New England and in Iowa (as well as being recognized as legally binding in a few other jurisdictions, such as New York State). At bottom, marriage, whether same- or other-sexed, is two people who have committed their lives together in a mutually supportive relationship. But that doesn’t necessarily always mean mutually exclusive. Such an open attitude extends to at least some of the committed couples that have chosen to continue to attend Circuit parties. Just as partnered men have been going dancing for years, recently legally married couples are also traveling to cities to carouse. Yes, they’ve got that “piece of paper from the City Hall keeping us tied and true,” in Joni Mitchell’s memorable phrasing. But it doesn’t mean that they are doomed to spending their nights knitting in front of Golden Girls reruns. If anything, the same promises of a great Circuit weekend are at least as attractive to committed couples. They can enjoy a break from reality, surrounded by hot men. With all that in mind, I sought out couples officially married — or at least partnered in a long-term relationship — to pose the question: “What effect (if any) has the Circuit had on your relationship?” Look But Don’t Touch (Or Do!) Marco and Mike from Houston know another couple that doesn’t go to Circuit parties because “they think it’s all about extramarital sex and drugs. They question why we go to those parties,” Marco told me. He and Mike have spent some time hashing out these issues and agree that they can go to parties without feeling the need to pick up anyone. They have come to believe that bringing a third party into the wedding bed would cheapen the union of two people committed to each other. “Besides,” Marco added, “sex with a long-time partner can offer dimensions of exploration not advisable with anyone else. Mike and I agree the physical intimate bonding between two people, gay or straight, who love each other, should remain intimate and special between the two for it to have meaning and lasting depth.” That doesn’t mean there haven’t been some lively discussions of the issue, but “at the end of it all, we agree: my body is his, and his is mine,” Marco said. “I can honestly say after 10 years of fun, notwithstanding all those pretty boys I like to admire now and then, there is no man I’d rather share my body with than him.” Peter and Robert from Montreal recently celebrated their 12th anniversary. But their attitude is 180 degrees from Marco and Mike. “One day we’ll be six feet under, and we want to make damn sure we’ve tried everything at the buffet before our time is up,” Peter said. “I look forward to the treats appearing tomorrow. And if what I ate makes me puking sick, it doesn’t mean I will never have an appetite again and won’t be back at the buffet.” Parties provide an array of treats from which to choose. David and his partner Steve, from Palm Springs, also fall more closely into the couples typified by the San Francisco study. “As gay men in American society, we have had to re-arrange what straights consider normal and moral,” David said. “To be gay is to accept that you are different in ways many people find objectionable. I decided marriage did not have to be monogamous, nor could I find a reason for monogamy. Stephen held more traditional views but over time has learned to expand beyond what he was taught or originally believed. Our relationship has evolved over the years to include solo play, threesomes and foursomes.” Another study, privately funded by two men from Oakland, Calif., buttressed the notion that gay couples are navigating their own unique form of marriage. Blake Spears’ and Lanz Lowens’ study (http://www.thecouplesstudy.com) included 86 couples. The age skewed older than the San Francisco study, so there weren’t many Circuit boys, but some couples still liked to go clubbing. Although calling monogamy “a viable option” for gay couples, they concluded that “when partners find enough common ground in their inclinations and perspectives toward non-monogamy, sanctioned outside sex is a sustainable and satisfying possibility.” Sex outside marriage allows men to “follow their nature,” they said, “meet differing needs, and seek variety without jeopardizing their relationship.” The couples did not equate marriage with monogamy. The Circuit — Good for Marriage, Except When It’s Not As for the Circuit, Phillip from Dallas jokes that “gay marriage may actually increase participation! It’s practically a honeymoon getaway already.” The Circuit, he said, is merely an extension of the kind of life they have at home. “If the couple uses the Circuit as a vacation experience, then I don’t think marriage would affect it one way or another.” Several couples do just that and remain active on the Circuit as their own Club Med. Since Xavier and Jeff live in San Francisco, they cannot get married (as of this writing), but they consider themselves very much in a committed relationship — and still love to go to parties. Nearly seven years ago, Steve Weinstein, the editor of noiZe, interviewed a New York couple that had gotten married in Toronto. They spent their honeymoon at Montreal’s Black & Blue, where they picked up a third as a mutual wedding gift. The couple has stayed happily married — and just as happily attending parties and meeting other men for mutual play. “If a couple chooses to step out in their normal day-to-day lives, then their extracurricular entertainment may or may not be affected by a so-called ‘legal’ marriage,” Phillip notes. “It’s not unlike straight married couples who enjoy swinging, right?” The Circuit is what each couple makes of it. For some, it means bonding with friends; for others, it’s a sexual adventure. “If they step out when they go to local clubs, then they’ll do it at a Circuit party,” Phillip noted. On the negative side, it should be noted that some relationships couldn’t stand the strain of being open, bringing in a third or participating in group sex. Larry and Mark had partnered in Phoenix for several years, but they broke up because there was too much outside activity. Similarly, Mark and Marcus from Toronto were no longer a couple after seven years together. Others cite reasons similar to the ones single men might give for cutting back on Circuit events or giving them up altogether: aging, issues with drug use, expenses, work obligations, health or other lifestyle changes. Ultimately, married couples are approaching the Circuit the same way they are negotiating all of the other facets of their lives. Some will play; others will look; and still others will not even go that far. As gay marriage becomes more and more accepted and a part of the social landscape, the Circuit will be seeing more men with rings on their fingers. But that doesn’t mean their eyes might not be wandering. 2010-11-03T07:49:14+00:00